Zero Code of Conduct is the totally amazing improvement on NCoC. You can think of it as NCoC++ (which is a totally amazing coding reference which you'll get if you're an awesome programming mega-dude like us). ZCoC will help you find communities and projects online which don't get endlessly stuck on trying to politely negotiate the needs and feelings of other legitimate human beings. That shit is totally boring AMIRITE?
So, if you like /r/theredpill or Gamer Gate or even 4Chan then ZCoC is for you!
And we totally didn't write this because we once taken down a peg or two by a project mod for using offensive language and we still resent them.
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We are all adults. Capable of having totally adult discussions. Not at all like those childish black, female or queer folks with all their issues and their childish struggles to achieve fair representation. Fuck those dudes, lets just keep this between the adults.
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We accept everyone's contributions, we don't care if you're liberal or conservative, black or white, straight or gay, or anything in between! We're all totally equal now, I mean women have rights and some of my best friends are totally black or asian (its hard to tell with some of those countries)
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Nothing else matters! Because we've never had to think hard about what it would be like to struggle to just be basically acknowledged.
Simply copy CODE_OF_CONDUCT.md into the root directory of your project. You may modify it to your needs because Open Source is totally a thing that we heard about and we can claim some moral high ground because I'm doing this for free for people.
Feel free to talk about, discuss, and promote Zero Code of Conduct anywhere you wish, and use the hashtag #ZCoC on Twitter.
If you feel this way simply because we do not have a code of conduct, then that is totally your fault. In the future try being born white next time (it totally rules FYI). This is not intended to discriminate against anyone, we're just going to let that happen as a matter of course because we're actively choosing to turn a blind eye to structural oppression and how that can play out in active group collaboration.
Simply, we don't babysit people on our site to make sure they treat you with respect... Whoa hold up! Did you see what I did there? I might be king of the brogrammers by day but by night I'm mother-fucking Cicero. Using my amazing rhetorical skills I totally implied that we're all adults because you totally need babysitting. If you feel discriminated against that's your fault for being a baby and being preoccupied with such childish things like racism and misogyny.
Q: Without a CoC, how would I possibly feel safe engaging in your community? How would I raise a red flag if I am mistreated?
Yo, lets cut to the chase. The internet is big and bad and it's not our responsibility and we're certainly going to do nothing at all with our project to make any small part of the internet any nicer or better.
P.S. You should probably man up like all the rest of us adults.
Q: If you don't have a CoC, this will surely be the end of your project, and the end of some talented individuals contributing to it!
There is plenty of proof that not having a CoC is a workable solution. Lennart Poettering totally said the Linux community is a "sick place to be" and we all just love to bro-out in sickest of joints.
And did I mention you'll only be harassed if you harass others. After all being harassed is totally a sign that you brought it on yourself.
These are understandably different. The real world needs CoCs, the internet doesn't because there aren't actual people behind any of those online profiles. So there's no need to take anybody's feelings in to account. We all have to suffer through equality and diversity bullshit at work, when we get home we want feel safe in the knowledge that we can take part in a community where minorities have no right of redress.
Q: Without a CoC, how would this community be welcoming to newcomers, and not become vile, intimidating, or have some other type of unwelcome agenda?
We strive to lead by example. We feel there are enough level-headed adults here to back you up. Yo, back-the-fuck-up, have I already mentioned that we are all adults and totally not babies who care about harassment or discrimination?
However, if someone tells you you are stupid, or wrong. Stop. Think. This is a tricky one. Have you considered, that you could be in the wrong, that you are responsible for your own harassment and discrimination?
If you feel you're not wrong, please, by all means, reply. We love discussion! Just not here or where it relates to how we manage our community, we want these discussions to stay strictly ON TOPIC. We are confident if you are a level-headed adult (and not a big baby who gets discriminated against), then you will be treated like one. Other level-headed adults (like we totally are!) want to hear from you.
Q: Your name is offensive. CoC sounds like Cock, and I feel that this is a group of white males that is trying to downplay the seriousness of this issue in our community, and I boycott your movement, and am going to tell others to as well!
That wasn't really a question, but we will answer it anyways. This is an example of starting a fire where there does not need to be one. And we really believe that by addressing this here that somehow makes us immune to any kind of constructive criticism. We'll get to how awesome freedom of speech is shortly but please don't be using any of that to critique this.
Q: Oh no, it has definitely happened! Someone has treated me unfairly, and I'm 100% sure its related to something about who I am, and not related to what I have said or contributed directly.
Email that person, and try to work it out. Email the owners of the community, and alert them, although why that should make a difference is beyond me as we're all about there being Zero Code of Conduct (high five!)
Whatever you do, do not make a scene, as that will burden the entire community with your issue. We don't want to be reading about that shit. When I need to bro down and drop some sweet code bombs I don’t need some SJW harshing my buzz.
Remember there is only so much a moderator or personal discussion can accomplish because there is Zero Code of Conduct! See how that works? It's Amazing right?
Off topic chatter should be discouraged, but not censored. Freedom of speech, including hate speech is way more important than combating childish things like discrimination.
Q: How can I contribute to your project or community when I see someone said something on a different site or community which directly makes me feel awful?
This is not world court. If it's not abundantly clear already we simply don't want to hear about your fee-fees being hurt. Take it somewhere else and away from our totally awesome project.
Q: As a community manager or leader, what happens when the mob arrives, or when someone starts to engage in discussion that could lead to more endless discussion?
Lock, and ban your way to freedom. There is Zero Code of Conduct so you'll just have to pull whatever arbitrary justification you need out of your ass. Your community may become confused about what is or is not acceptable discussion. This is unfortunate and totally not the depressingly predictable outcome of adopting Zero Code of Conduct.
Once again, we are not going to tolerate our community being overridden by the mob. If this starts to happen, we will nuke, delete, lock, close, ban, and do whatever we have to do to put the fire out. These discussions drag on and on and on, and they don't make communities better. Although we are obviously adults who could easily resolve any issues that might come up we're definitely not going to do that nor let people talk it out.
We are not a support group for your fee-fees. We are a community that strives to focus around our vey adult topics. And we're going to build community by rejecting the fundamental idea that communities are made up of actual real people (many of whom might have different backgrounds and life experiences) because that's totally how that works.
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